The one question that basically EVERY woman has asked herself at some point in her life is, ‘How can I become a better woman?’ Many times, they don’t have a definite answer to this question. They don’t know where to start from to improve themselves as women.

I believe that the reason for this is that many women don’t really know what the term ‘better woman’ really means.

You are not a superior woman to any woman. You are better today than yesterday. You are now a better woman.

One who can stay in their comfort zone and has learned how to improve her mental and spiritual abilities is a better woman. One who is more mature than the person she was yesterday is a better woman. She doesn’t hesitate to be kind and compassionate with herself as well as others. She doesn’t fear to let go of societal limitations and expectations, and takes control over her life.

Want to make a difference in the lives of women?

These seven tips will help you decide if yes.

Choose what you wish for yourself

The first step to becoming a more confident woman is knowing what you desire for yourself. It is up to you to determine the direction in which your life will go.

You can figure out what you are looking for by asking yourself hard questions that you answer honestly. This includes, but is not limited to:

1. You want to be a business woman. A career woman? Maybe both.
2. Are you looking to marry? Do you want to be single? Become a nun perhaps?
3. Are you interested in having children? Do you want to have children?
4. Are you a work- or stay-at home mom?
5. You like adventure, and you love to travel. Are you more comfortable staying in an area you know well?
6. Do you want to get a Bachelors’ degree? Maybe a Master’s degree? What about a PhD?

No matter what your decision, don’t be afraid to express them and never stop trying. It is your life, after all, and you’re the one living it. You are the only one who can make it happen. So don’t be scared to decide what you want for yourself. Don’t let the pressure and seeming glamor of other people’s lives affect your decisions over your own.

You can make a difference in your life by mapping out exactly the path you wish to take. You can use this to measure your success in any venture that you choose.

Be kind to yourself

This is a key point that cannot be underemphasized. Self-love is a key step in becoming a better women. Understanding that self-love doesn’t necessarily mean selfishness is important. Selfishness is a lack of consideration for others, while self-love involves showering love on yourself so you can show the same love to friends, family, and perhaps a special someone in your life.

Be very careful with yourself. By this, I don’t mean you should start conforming to any societal standards. It is important to make you the most important priority in your daily life. Life, in general, is stressful. Working a job (maybe even two jobs), getting an education, building a home, raising kids, building your career and running a business can easily cause the neglect of one’s self.

These things are very important but it is even more important to take care of the person who is handling all these responsibilities—and that person is you. You must put your safety, health, and stability first. You can take part in a number of self-care activities, such as the following:

1. Spa visits
2. A manicure and pedicure
3. Relaxing massage
4. Either cooking a home-cooked meal, or ordering take-out
5. A new style for your hair
6. How to burn sage
7. The act of reading a book

Because they are able to show their love for others, it is much easier to care for them. Take some time to relax and recharge when you’re feeling exhausted by your daily responsibilities. It will help you prepare for the next step in your journey.

If you’re having a hard time loving and accepting yourself, these books will guide you through this process.

Talking trash about other women is unacceptable

Ever heard the saying, ‘Women are their own enemies’? Yeah? Why do people say these things so often, particularly men?

I’ll answer that for you.

It’s because many women have been conditioned to see other women as rivals rather than sisters. In order to diminish the woman’s reputation, many women are jealous when another woman rises. The annoying part is that the woman doesn’t have to do anything wrong for other women to bash her.

Don’t play innocent. At some time, you have probably done it. It’s something I did. As we pass a lady walking along the streets, we try to spot something wrong with her. You might notice her facial features, body, gait or anything else.

This is a shameful act.

It is our responsibility as women to support other women and remind them about their value. It is time to come together to change the systems that are putting women behind. Encourage a woman to rise up in the workplace. Applaud a woman when she wins an award. Encourage her when she fails. When she’s down, pick her up.

Today, be positive and proud to show your support for other women. This will make you a stronger woman.

You can love your body without explanation

You know what it’s like to love your body? It is still difficult for me to love my body.

Many women—me included—say and think negative things about their bodies. Society has made it easy for women to believe superficial ideals about beauty, which are propagated by the media and internet.

Pictures of bikini-clad women with tiny waists, big boobs and butts, flat-as-an-ironing-board stomachs, impossibly smooth, blemish-free, hair-free skin, flowing hair, full lips and eyebrows, and long lashes are splattered all over our IG and Facebook feeds and women internalize these features as ‘perfect’.

When a person’s body does not match these ideals, people tend to say insulting things that stick to and torment the victim. This kind of bullying is most common in children who are young and vulnerable.

It has gotten to the point where many women don’t ever feel that they look good, or that their bodies are in great shape. Cellulite and the stretch marks around their butts and thighs are what they see as negative. Their large curves and ugly appearance are what they see as excessive. They consider their large stomachs, saggy boobs, and huge stomachs to be disgusting.

When they believe they are overweight or obese, many women suffer from eating disorders. Some people become obsessed with working out in the gym. Many resort to extreme procedures, such as plastic surgeries, to look ‘perfect’. These surgeries can often be performed by quack physicians and result in disfiguring and unwanted results.

It’s not an easy thing to do, but we, as a society, need to start appreciating real bodies. It’s not ugly to have stretch marks and cellulite. Textured skin and acne scarring are natural. If you have sparse eyebrows and eyelashes, that’s okay. Are you a large stomach with lots of belly fat? Well, that’s beautiful.

Although it can seem difficult to let go of negative thoughts, there are many books available that will help you overcome them.

Your body is something to be proud of. You should take care of your body, give it food and push it to its limits. Do not forget to love every part of your body.

Receive compliments

Confidence issues can make it difficult to take compliments from others about yourself. It’s not your fault that someone’s good wishes and genuine admiration for you sounds like a lie. It is worth noting that inability to accept compliments likely results from your negative view of yourself.

I’m not gonna say you should snap out of it; that makes absolutely zero. However, I can say that accepting compliments and loving yourself goes hand in hand. Those nice things people say about you to your face are true and they’re valid.

If someone tells you that you’re pretty, it’s because you are—and nothing is going to change that. If someone says that you were successful in a particular endeavor, trust them. Don’t make responses like:

• Nah, it wasn’t that good
• Pfftt! Don’t flatter me, please
• No, I’m not!
• I don’t think so, but thanks!

Don’t say anything like that. Be a better woman by accepting compliments. Don’t forget to thank that kind fellow for reminding you of how awesome you truly are.

Accepting comments depends on how you view yourself. How do you communicate with yourself? Are you positive or negative? Are you able to forgive yourself, or are you hard on yourself? If you don’t know how to begin to see yourself in a positive light, Shad Helmstetter’s book, How to Talk to YourselfYou can get great help from the following:

Here are some books to help with low self-esteem.

You should be proud of your achievements

Everybody has to face obstacles at one point. Even the most talented of people will find them. Sometimes it’s a colleague or boss standing in the way of a work promotion, or a romantic partner who tries to suppress the way you express yourself. It can be a neighbor who plays loud music that prevents you from getting a good night’s rest.

These external factors are scary and disturbing, but they aren’t your primary problem. The main problem you have is YOU. Yeah, you. Don’t believe me? Answer these questions honestly.

• Do you think you’re great at what you do?
• Is it possible to be proud of the woman that you are?
• Do you think you’re badass?
• Do you think you’re improving and becoming a better person every day?

If all your answers to these questions are not an emphatic ‘Yes’, there definitely is a problem somewhere.

You must first stand up for yourself, before rallying behind someone else. No matter your progress, you have to feel proud of who and what you are. Don’t let anyone decide how proud you should feel about your grade point average or when you get a job. Don’t let anybody’s opinion influence how excited you should feel when you finally conquer a fear or take up a new hobby.

Understanding yourself is the first step to understanding your joys, sorrows, expectations, standards and fears. You can let your understanding of yourself determine how you feel about moving forward.

Understand that it’s badass to be innovative and smart. It’s wonderful to be great at what you do and succeed in something new you just tried. Are you looking for a better job? Celebrate with champagne. Have you ever managed to twist yourself into a seemingly impossible yoga position? Tell people about this accomplishment and be proud. Thank someone who praises your accomplishments.

You are perfectly allowed to feel proud of yourself. Celebrate your accomplishments because, at the end, you are alone.

Being a better women means being happy with yourself, your accomplishments and yourself.

Explore new ideas

Push yourself to be better and push beyond your comfort zones in order to become a more confident woman. You shouldn’t be confined to the same thing or addicted to it. You should try new things!

Do all the crazy things you’ve wanted to do. Go to those faraway lands you’ve always wanted to visit. Explore new cultures and try new foods. Get on an adventure and take part in exciting, crazy, and mind-blowing activities.

Have you ever thought about zip-lining or skydiving? Bungee jumping, maybe? Do it! You want to see all the amazing paintings at The Louvre? You can save money, pack your essential stuff, and head out! Want to see the Wonders of the Modern World. You should do it!

All the things you’ve never dreamed you could accomplish. It is only in doing that, that you’ll realize who you really are. A routine-based life can lead to boredom, monotony and a lack of fulfillment.

You can find a variety of interesting things on this planet, as well as beautiful, captivating places and delicious foods to try. There are many life-altering experiences you’ve never had. When you try new things, you become introduced to new depths and aspects of yourself that you didn’t know existed. You’ll also be able to find your passion and purpose in life.

Get out of that box—the box in which you have put yourself or the one society has put you in. It doesn’t matter how big or small the box may look, it is important to live life without it.

Conclusion

Each woman has her own journey. These seven tips will help you be the woman you desire to be.

1. Choose what you wish for yourself
2. Be kind to yourself
3. Talking trash about other women is unacceptable
4. You can love your body without explanation
5. Receive compliments
6. You should be proud of your achievements
7. Explore new ideas